Yesterday. Tomorrow. Today., Apr. 19

Dear Dairy,

Today can not happen without Yesterday, and tomorrow will not unveil itself until today is over.

Yet, tomorrow is not solely dependent on today.

And Yesterday does not define who I am today.

Each day is a new opportunity to dream and imagine.

I still carry emotions created from past joys and traumas that infect and permeate my dreams, delights, and imaginations.

They can dictate my actions and imaginings. They are heavy until I unburden them. Unburdening to me does not mean shedding the baggage completely but making space for new experiences and dreams to uplift the heaviness of the past.

If I do not have a good relationship with my emotional essence and have not made space to deal with the difficult things, it is harder to appreciate or notice the little delights throughout the day. It is harder to stretch my body.

It is harder to breathe the good breaths.

Being tied to my past does not mean I have to depend on it.

I have realized I am allowed to dream and imagine things that seem unobtainable. There are some past moments where the experience creates walls and barriers. There are ceilings I have hit that make me want to quit. But those experiences do not define the whole world. And there are learning moments sometimes, but I have learned not to moralize every moment to produce a lesson that justifies future harm and continued toxic behavior.

I cannot bury my past, but the past does not have to bury my present and future selves.

It is necessary to dream dreams. Dreaming can process harm, treat my wounds, and make space to love some of my scars. But love is hard. It takes energy and focus.

Sometimes I do not have that, so it is also okay not to dream the dreams.

And that is pretty cool.

More to come, promise