Dear Diary, 19, Trust

Dear Diary,

I am exhausted.

But good.

I posted the first episode for Lil’ Histories today!

I spent time working on that, rather than my thesis. But I am trying to trust that it was time worth spending.

It was what my impulse was telling me to do.

I know that sounds wild. But, I am learning that my impulse is who I really am. It is driven my anxiety and the urge to dance.

I used to repress that side of me. In adopting Aspen and beginning the transition, I have learned that this side of me is what makes me special.

So, I am beginning to listen to my impulse more constantly and with more mindfulness. It has helped create a sense of beingness that I longed for my entire life without knowing I longed.

But listening takes a whole lot of trust. And trust is hard to come by sometimes.

It has taken a lot of work to find both love and trust in myself. Now that I have begun to find both, I am discovering that these types of breakthroughs are not endings, but beginnings to a whole new way of seeing and interacting with the world.

It is quite amazing.

Life is love.

Life is trust.

Life is exhausting.

Thanks for listening.

More to come, promise